Rick James once said, “Cocaine is a powerful drug.”  Well the Lamborghini Countach is a powerful car thanks to its mid-engine longitudinally mounted V-12.  And if we believe Charlie Murphy’s stories from Chappelle’s Show, one easily imagines a bunch of coked-out ’70s and ’80s celebrities driving the Countach from club to club on the Sunset Strip.  But do not dismiss the Countach for its wild and crazy reputation.  Why?  Because it is the car that launched the automotive imaginations of just about every boy motorist born in its heyday.  Just by looking at it (which is all most people get to do), one immediately knows that this is a supercar.  If the Ferrari Testarossa was pretty (which is debatable), the Countach was its crazy-ass super freak[1] rival.  From its wedge nose[2] to its massive rear spoiler, the Countach screams at you.  It has the presence of fighter jet—intakes and all.  For that reason, you could almost believe that a kid penned the design on the back of a math worksheet whilst day dreaming in elementary school[3].  Which is fitting since the Countach is a dream car.  In reality, it is a pain in the ass to drive.  With poor visibility and permanently reclined seats[4], this car’s drivers must like pleasure with pain.  So even if one never acquires a Countach, one should still find the opportunity to examine it up close.  It’s such a freaky scene.
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[1] One should not take a Countach home to one’s mother.

[2] Perhaps you have seen a Countach with hideous, massive black bumpers.  Don’t hate Lamborghini for that atrocity.  U.S. regulators were to blame.

[3] Luckily, the actual designer removed the missiles and gun turrets that surely accompanied that child’s original design.

[4] So your face does not hit the extremely raked windshield.

Photo(s) from Wikipedia.

The Saleen S7 is best described in one word—crazy.  But in the supercar market, you are never going to survive unless you get a little crazy[1].  And so Steve Saleen’s first effort at building an original American supercar resulted in the S7.  A car that (in its most potent production iteration) does 0-60 in under 3 seconds and hits the quarter mile in just 10.5 seconds thanks to a 7.0 liter, twin-turbocharged Ford V-8 making 750 brake horse power and 700 pound feet of torque.  Keep in mind that the S7 put down those numbers back in 2005.  Which makes those stats crazy, but it feels alright[2] because crazy is what makes the S7 awesome.  As for the S7’s design—a carbon fiber body, numerous functional vents, scissor doors, large wheels, and a low profile all scream “MAD WITH POWER” louder than Putin shirtless on horseback.  Even today, the S7 can destroy just about any other American production car out there[3].   Maybe the only thing crazier than the car itself is the odd variety of films in which the S7 has appeared[4].  Sadly, production on the S7 stopped in 2009.  But the S7 is still crazy after all these years[5].  And the Gentleman Motorist wants one pretty badly.  Does that make me crazy?  Possibly[6].
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[1] Seal, “Crazy.”

[2] Britney Spears, “Crazy.”

[3] Probably not the Hennessey Venom GT.  But the S7 predates that car by a number of years and looks better too.  Not mention that the S7 has a legitimate American Le Mans Series racing pedigree that Hennessey can’t challenge.

[4] Bruce Almighty and Alvin and the Chipmunks—Really?!?!?!

[5] Paul Simon, “Still Crazy After All These Years.”

[6] Gnarls Barkley, “Crazy.”

Photo(s) from Wikipedia.

They say, “never judge a book by its cover.”  Sound advice.  But if we are being honest, some things are all about the cover.  Case in point, the Maserati Gran Turismo.  If Jimmy Fallon were writing this post, he would say, “Thank you, Pininfarina, for designing another beautiful car and for letting some manufacturer get all the credit.”  The Gran Turismo is arm candy, plain and simple.  Given its cost, many other cars with superior performance credentials are more deserving of your hard-earned money.  But they don’t look like this, do they?  From front to back, the Gran Turismo’s design is full of eye-catching elements.  Starting with the concave grill and its traditional trident--one of the all-time best aspirators around.  It rests in perfect proportion to the elegant, sloping hood and aggressive, alluring lights that wrap around the front fascia like a pair of sporty sunglasses[1].  Continuing down the sides, one notices the trio of side vents and athletic shoulders that accent the wheel wells filled out with trident rims[2].  Above them, a curvaceous canopy with a lovely little kink in the C pillar[3].  And, in the back, the lines converge in a tight tail that is neither too big nor too small[4].  The S variant also sounds the part, with a large V8 churning out 434 brake horse power and 360 pound feet of torque.  So, at bottom, the Gran Turismo is really about the theater of motor sports.  But at least you’ve got great seats for the show.
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[1] Even though Oakley’s eye jackets are horribly out of style, a little nostalgia never hurt anyone.

[2] Italians love the concept of the trinity.

[3] Maserati finally got this element right after its abortive design for the Coupé from the last decade.

[4] One wonders if Sir Mix-a-Lot would agree.

Photo(s) from Wikipedia.

Thank you for your question, dear reader.  Given the nature of the Gentleman Motorist’s blog, one might assume that the Gentleman Motorist does not care about the environment.  But nothing could be further from the truth.

Climate change is complicated.  And the science behind it is above the Gentleman Motorist’s pay grade.  But even if one is not convinced that the planet is warming at an unprecedented rate, one should take precautions against the draconian future that scientists have described.

So do not panic, Kermit.  Only sheep drive Prii.  And the Gentleman Motorist is here to give automotive enthusiasts a couple of pointers to make it easier being green.    

In a classic sketch from episode one of Saturday Night Live’s fifth season, Steve Martin and Bill Murray stare directly into the camera and ask, “What the hell is that?!?!”  The Gentleman Motorist had the same reaction last week when he saw the Suzuki X-90 in person.