Perhaps Not: The Suzuki X-90

In a classic sketch from episode one of Saturday Night Live’s fifth season, Steve Martin and Bill Murray stare directly into the camera and ask, “What the hell is that?!?!”  The Gentleman Motorist had the same reaction last week when he saw the Suzuki X-90 in person.

If you thought the Sidekick was a confusing mess, take a look at its Mini Me[1].  It has a removable roof so that people can stare at you and question your life choices.  It also has a 6-Disc CD Changer, as if Suzuki thought people would want to spend long periods of time inside an X-90.  And look at the wheel-to-car ratio!  Suzuki apparently invented the Donk before Donks became a thing[2].  The Gentleman Motorist particularly appreciates the X-90’s rear spoiler because a 1.6 liter inline four cylinder engine with 95 bhp really needs all the down force it can get.  One assumes Suzuki intended the X-90 to be sporty, like Middlebury[3] students playing an IQA sanctioned Muggle Quidditch match[4].  On second thought, Suzuki, please bring the X-90 back into production.  The Gentleman Motorist knows a target market just itching to get their hands on an X-90.  And you can charge a premium for the Golden Snitch Edition.
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[1] One assumes that the X-90 was conceived for use at Shriners’ conventions.

[2] Though Donks are not the province of gentleman motorists, they are far more entertaining than the X-90.

[3] Middlebury is a wonderful academic institution known for its foreign language studies.  That said, the Gentleman Motorist does not speak the language of these prancing Panthers.

[4] Yes, sadly this is a real thing.  Google it.

Photo(s) from Wikipedia.

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