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Gentleman's Choice:  The Lamborghini Countach

7/29/2014

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Rick James once said, “Cocaine is a powerful drug.”  Well the Lamborghini Countach is a powerful car thanks to its mid-engine longitudinally mounted V-12.  And if we believe Charlie Murphy’s stories from Chappelle’s Show, one easily imagines a bunch of coked-out ’70s and ’80s celebrities driving the Countach from club to club on the Sunset Strip.  But do not dismiss the Countach for its wild and crazy reputation.  Why?  Because it is the car that launched the automotive imaginations of just about every boy motorist born in its heyday.  Just by looking at it (which is all most people get to do), one immediately knows that this is a supercar.  If the Ferrari Testarossa was pretty (which is debatable), the Countach was its crazy-ass super freak[1] rival.  From its wedge nose[2] to its massive rear spoiler, the Countach screams at you.  It has the presence of fighter jet—intakes and all.  For that reason, you could almost believe that a kid penned the design on the back of a math worksheet whilst day dreaming in elementary school[3].  Which is fitting since the Countach is a dream car.  In reality, it is a pain in the ass to drive.  With poor visibility and permanently reclined seats[4], this car’s drivers must like pleasure with pain.  So even if one never acquires a Countach, one should still find the opportunity to examine it up close.  It’s such a freaky scene.
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[1] One should not take a Countach home to one’s mother.

[2] Perhaps you have seen a Countach with hideous, massive black bumpers.  Don’t hate Lamborghini for that atrocity.  U.S. regulators were to blame.

[3] Luckily, the actual designer removed the missiles and gun turrets that surely accompanied that child’s original design.

[4] So your face does not hit the extremely raked windshield.

Photo(s) from Wikipedia.
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