Perhaps Not: Suzuki Sidekick

Our next nominee is the Suzuki Sidekick.  Like the movie with the same name, these Sidekicks beg the question, “Why?”  Well because “I really truly want an extremely small, underpowered, convertible, Japanese sport utility vehicle in which I can do nothing,” said no one ever.  The Sidekick initially came with an engine featuring a displacement of 1 whole liters and eventually offered an 80 bhp engine and four-wheel drive.  Easy, tiger.  For the sake of argument, let us assume that statistics do not matter and that the Sidekick’s utility is of no import.  Even then, no gentleman motorist would drive one.  Why?  Because look at it.  One cannot be taken seriously in this automobile.  Suzuki attempted to make something cute and feminine into something rugged and masculine.[1]  Put another way, you could dress Kate Upton in Arnold Schwarzenegger’s costume from Predator, but would she would get to the choppa?  This type of bad casting leads to nothing but impotency and sexual confusion.[2]  And that is sort of how one feels about the Sidekick.
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[1] Or is that the other way around?  I guess that’s the point.  Perhaps Suzuki's design team would have benefited from the expertise of David Bowie or Annie Lennox.  One assumes the resulting Sidekick would have been far more entertaining.

[2] This sensation has been well explained by Garth Algar in the film "Wayne's World."  “Garth Algar: Did you ever find Bugs Bunny attractive when he put on a dress and played a girl bunny?  Wayne Campbell: No. [cracks up laughing] No.  Garth Algar: Neither did I.  I was just asking.”

Photo(s) from Wikipedia.